The discussion about how communication is often not one just end of the spectrum (completely impersonal) or the other end of the spectrum (completely personal), but rather, exists on a continuum between these two extremes really resonated with me. Reading about philosopher Martin Buber's I-It, I-You, and I-Thou communication relationships allowed me to reflect on my own everyday interactions with other people and how I've unknowingly had experiences communicating in these three different ways with others. In addition I've had experience receiving these forms of communication from others.
For example, as a freshman on campus last year I really wanted to get involved and make a difference in the community. One of the ways I did so was by taking a Freshman Odyssey Seminar in Leadership and Service that centered around volunteering at Oasis Catolico, an afterschool program for latin american kids living in impoverished trailer communities around Athens. Every week we would go in for three to four hours and tutor kids right as they came off their buses. And as luck would have it, I somehow ended up in the table of 4 little feisty second-grade boys (at the time when I sat down I thought, oh no one else wants to handle the 4 boys I guess, but how bad can they be? I have my 8 year old brother that I take care of all the time; surely they'll be a bit energetic like him but they shouldn't be too hyper after school) As I soon found out, "energetic" was a bit of an understatement as those four boys flew through the door like it was nothing, beaming with eager smiles and mischievous glints in their eyes. The session started immediately with a stampede of questions thrown all at once to me: "Are you Chinese?", "Teach me Chinese!", "I know 'Ni Hao!'", "I know I know how to say Thank you! It's 'Xie xie' right?" Thus in this moment we clearly were communicating in an I-You relationship as they were only recognizing one part of me and defining me solely by it (they were only acknowledging the part they could clearly see: that I was Asian and could probably speak some Chinese).
Once I finally dispelled their inquisitive questions by promising to teach them Chinese after they finished all of their homework, they began treat me as a teacher by asking questions and allowing me to give them advice on how to approach their homework problems. So in this aspect they were also just focusing on one aspect of me and basing their communication on my role as a teacher. Similarly, for that first day I also treated them solely as students and only talked to them about their schoolwork, plans for the week at school, and activities they did in class that day. Thus on that first day, both they and I were functioning on a mutual understanding that we were in an I-You communication relationship where we only talked to each other based on our roles to each other.
Yet, over the weeks, as I went each week and sat at the same group of desks, we slowly began to develop an I-Thou communication relationship where we could talk more about other aspects of ourselves besides our immediate roles to each other. For example, besides just realizing that I could teach them Chinese and help them with homework, they also learned that I have a younger brother about their same age, I like dragonfruit, and I used to play lacrosse in middle school, swim on the neighborhood swim team in the summer, and run cross country in high school. I also learned more about their own backgrounds, families, and everyday drama they had at school or between their friends. Thus by learning other aspects about each other and being able to build a multi-dimensional picture of each other as unique individuals with many different characteristics, we were able to slowly engage in more and more I-Thou conversations over the course of the semester. Those memories and aspects I learned about them truly made the class one of the most surprising and heart-warming classes I've been able take here at UGA.
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